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Oct 02, 2019, 06:28AM

Emma Gets Rear-Ended

Some people + common decency = NOT THERE.

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Hmm… might act out in some small way for attention. Not sure yet. I typed this and then got in my truck... and then someone rear-ended it. I told her to put her four ways on and she asked me what they were. LEGENDARY BMW GENERAL MOTORS COLLAB I HAVE TO LAUGH I GUNNED IT WITH HER AND HER BROTHER ON THE HOOD OF THEIR SHITASS SUV TO TRY AND LEVER IT DOWN AND IT JUST PULLED THEIR LITTLE PIECE OF SHIT LIKE SIX FEET FORWARD!

Kids, buy American.

Really like enjoying the camaraderie and knowing shrugs of what’re-ya-gonna-do amongst the passing motorists today on Baltimore City's major west-east artery, Northern Parkway, today. Telling a tow truck driver "I’M NOT MAD" and being told "YOU A LITTLE BIT MAD" ahh, God bless me #emstersworld. Well the tow truck driver goosed 'em free and I’m gonna go see one of my favorite bands play and looks as I’ll be getting a shiny new bumper outta this anyway. It does remain Emster’s world love you fambly.

I’m no longer dwelling on vehicular incidents of yesterday. But a very funny question for someone driving poorly in a BMW to ask someone driving very well, and looking good and feeling good, in a cool truck that they then RAM is, "Were you going somewhere?" Bruh, I was driving. I have too many things to do today so I’m afraid that I may need to postpone contemplation hour. Going to turn down my thermostat by two degrees by way of recompense to get it as cold as a meat locker in here. Communicating with Rolo via cuneiform inscription.

My claims adjuster sounds hot... anyhoo throwing pots is cool. But there’s definitely just something about throwing BIG POTS. At its best, clay on the wheel reacts to your lobbies toward it with the fluctuations of some living thing. It BUCKS. Down Tennessee once, some veteran potter advised us to age our clay, to allow mold to grow over it. You dig it up from the dirt, and so it’s not like it isn’t. Hoo hoo, Emster does it. May have a glass of red wine to unwind myself with. Post-It notes are definitely a "joy in my life.” Of course it goes without saying that the premier building material is brick. But there’s just a singular delight to be had in encountering an expanse of rusticated block, which one is fortunate enough to find in some concentration in the Northeast.

Emster time (time of Em).

Also I’m getting my vagina removed.

—Follow Emma Wenzel on Twitter: @whorevidal

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