"Prices of beer in general have risen 3 percent compared to a year ago,
the biggest increase in beer prices in 2.5 years, according to the U.S.
Labor Department. Smaller microbrews, such as Firestone Walker's Union
Jack India Pale Ale, can cost as much as $9.99 for a six-pack, up 40
percent from last year.
With food prices growing at the fastest rate in 17 years, college students may soon be forced to choose between where they get their sustenance: traditional food or a more frosty, refreshingly carbonated alternative.
Gas may be $4 a gallon, eggs and milk may be up 13 percent, and we may
be fighting the most tragic war of our time, but the price of beer
going up?! Blasphemy!
Mr. President, we urgently need your intervention to put a stop to this tragedy and everything that could fall out from it. America may have plenty of pressing circumstances staring it in the face, but where will we be if we're unable to get sloppy drunk in order to forget about them?