Splicetoday

Digital
Jan 14, 2009, 11:08AM

A critic at large

The author is responsible for hilarious mock reviews of various items sold on Amazon.

A choice one:

I first discovered Dr. Parker's brilliant analysis and forecast of Indian stacking chair consumption while completing my thesis on the roll played by wheel based ergonomic office chairs in workplace fatalities. In particular, I found fascinating the statistical modeling employed by Dr. Parker to determine governmental stacking chair purchase requirements for the year 2011, which is well know to be the year that the Indian Civil Service Entrance Exam switches to a "Standing Only" testing methodology. Indeed, after months of careful study I can find only two obvious faults with the findings put forward by Dr. Parker. Firstly, and far more seriously, while Dr. Parker's analysis included over 2600 Indian municipalities, his thoughtless exclusion of Indian bowling allies cuts short any possible insight into the scarcity of stacking chairs and the effects on Hindu-Muslim bowling alley violence. Perhaps the infamy of the religious riots in Pune, following Mohinder Singh's perfect 300 game in 1998 led to this exclusion, I only hope that this obvious gap in analysis does not alienate future generations of readers and lead them to repudiation this otherwise thoughtful and deeply insightful study. My final criticism has to do with the quality of the publication and lack of full color illustrations. The choice to use black and white illustrations may be in keeping with the scholarly focus of this publication but I find it hard to distinguish between the Duo and Cello stacking chairs featured prominently on pages 316-318.

Finally, I must comment that Dr. Parker's treatise on stacking chairs has reinvigorated my own personal interest in furniture based consumption modeling and the related effects on the medical industry. I have recently begun a study of metal folding table usage in the southern United States and the corresponding rise in emergency room visitation. I won't provide any spoilers in this forum, but I can't help but tease the fact that I have found a widespread correlation between metal folding table usage at Baptist picnics and emergency room visitation for trauma in the distal and proximal interphalangeal joints. I encourage the many fans of this book to check back soon for my own publication.

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