Q: Why Magnus Arbuthnot! How unexpected to see you in South Jerusalem! What brings you here?
A: I have been sent by a respected and impartial NGO to investigate the carnage inflicted by Israel in the Gaza Strip.
Q: Which NGO would that be?
A: An NGO that uses an ostensible human-rights agenda as camouflage for an anti-Zionist, anti-Semitic program.
Q: So you’ve been south. What did you see there?
A: Collateral damage.
Q: Collateral to what?
A: To Israel’s right to defend itself.
Q: And what else?
A: To courageous Palestinian resistance against Zionist imperialism.
Q: What targets were hit?
A: Homes, schools, hospitals, military installations, and firing positions.
Q: How do you tell one from the other?
A: If you are Palestinian, you don’t bother.
Q: And if you are Israeli?
A: You shoot anyway.
Q: Could you be more specific? If you are a Hamas guerilla fighter, what is a legitimate military target?
A: Every outpost of Zionist imperialism.
Q: And what is an illegitimate civilian target?
A: Come again?
Q: The Israelis bombed homes and schools containing non-combatant men, women, and children.
A: They were being used as firing positions and endangering Israeli forces.
Q: How were they being used?
A: Cynically.